Ok.. The feeling is back.. It friggin hurts. I regret so much, what I've done in the past.. I think im gonna block quite a few people on my list of friends. I donno whyy, but i just feel like it. Actually thats just bullshit. Behind every action, there's a positive intention? Yea i agree. For me, behind every action, there is a reason. A reason in which i know. A reason in which the true meaning is private. A reason, just to have a reason.

Lets just say that, i feel used. No one understands me. I dont want that. I want to be understood. I want to feel loved too. Is this jealousy? Mebbe. But is she sending the totally wrong signals too? Hell yea. Edwin didnt bring the hamsters today, he's bringing the family over tmr. Im actually bored in coach training can you believe it. Really, this is shit. I dont like it, and i dont want it anymore. I just want to coach. For the pure love of it. For the passion of coaching.

Coaching, I love you.